MICRO CERS PLUS FINAL EXAM – TEACHER’S MODEL

NOTE:  The following teacher model closely follows the pattern of the Micro CERS Plus checkbric that will be used in grading the students' final exam this year.  It is an example of what A-level writing would look like for 8th grade. The topic is from a CERS prompt used several years ago. 

CLAIM

During the 2014 Super Bowl, Coca-Cola premiered a controversial television commercial titled It’s Beautiful featuring young Americans singing the National Anthem in non-English languages such as Hebrew, Spanish, and Arabic. Images included showing two gay fathers roller skating with their young daughter and a beautiful, smiling young Muslim woman wearing a hijab. Although some might find this commercial to be an attack on American values, the truth is that Coca-Cola celebrated diversity by expressing the idea of what being an American means. 

- Author, title, type of media
- Provides background information to orient the reader
- Turns the prompt into strong claim

EVIDENCE

In his editorial titled “America the Beautiful for the 21st Century,” columnist Raul Reyes points out that, “… the motto on the Great Seal of the United States [is]:  E pluribus unum.  It means ‘Out of many, one’ – and it’s in Latin,” (1).

- Uses a relevant quotation that sets up the Reasoning
- The choice of evidence is among the best, if not the best, from the options available
- The quotation is formatted correctly using an in-text citation

REASONING

In other words, baked into the very identity of the U.S.A. is the core concept of many different kinds of people becoming united. That motto is printed upon every American dollar and coin. It is enshrined upon the Presidential Seal where the President gives speeches. The fact that the motto is in Latin -- and not in English -- further recognizes that patriotism known no single language. For the record, Latin is typically associated with Spanish, French, and Italian. Coca-Cola is embracing the very idea of America by celebrating diversity in this commercial as a strength. The unmistakable lyrics and melody of the song unify people in a beautiful way that goes beyond language, race, or religion. Coke got it right.  One can be pro-immigrant and pro-America at the same time.

- Uses logic to elaborate, explain, and give examples of what the evidence means
- Connects the evidence back to the claim

COUNTER CLAIM

Some would argue that in presenting the National Anthem with different foreign languages, Coca-Cola is dividing allegiances and making a symbolic attack on traditional (mostly white) English-speaking America.

- Provides a short counter claim that briefly states the opposing position

COUNTER REASONING

They might point out that the Founding Fathers deliberately chose for the nation to have only one national language:  English.  Language is identity. Coca-Cola may be seen as pandering to “political correctness” while further dividing the country by tarnishing the most sacred of songs.  People cannot truly be one nation without having one language; and that’s English.

- Briefly elaborates and explains the opposition's rational and thinking behind their position

REBUTTAL

Where this argument goes astray is in how it dishonors many American’s parents, grandparents, and great grandparents. Unless someone’s ancestors were 100% British, those ancestors didn’t speak English. Were they not patriotic?  Did grandpa hate America because he couldn’t speak English?  Nonsense. The identities of people before they became U. S. citizens should be a point of pride -- not shame. There’s a connection between the children’s voices in the ad and many American families. Those singing kids are the same as most people’s grandparents. Coca-Cola never said not to learn English or that English is bad, but people will read whatever they want into something. The ad speaks for itself in reminding people that the love for one’s country goes beyond any one, single language. 

- Without restating the original evidence or reasoning, addresses the counter claim and counter reasoning directly
- Attempts to point out a flaw in the logic of the opposition's perspective by using their own argument against them

SYNTHESIS

Coca-Cola did a great service to audiences watching the Super Bowl by reminding everyone what it means to be an American. Yet many folks worry that our nation is becoming too divided right now. More division is not helping. Perhaps Coca-Cola could have made a companion commercial that would have been a mirror of this one. It could have featured black-and-white footage of immigrants from Ellis Island coming to America, with elderly voices singing the National Anthem in their own foreign tongues such as Polish, German, French or Italian. That gentle reminder about respecting one’s heritage would have silenced the critics and have sent the point home without being inflammatory. Diversity does not have to be divisive.

- Restates the original claim in different words.
- Explores further questions or implications that bubbled up through the argument
- Explores a compromise or third option in order to go above and beyond instead of being trapped within the only two binary options

CONVENTIONS
- Avoids using informal style (I... you... we... us... our... etc.)
- Avoids run-on sentences, comma splices, and sentence fragments
- Sentences flow with clear, understandable meaning
- There is no "fluff" or "filler" with sentences just restating what was already stated elsewhere